tackles the "over-thinking", ponderings, venting and reflection that circles not only the adult entertainment industry which Illianna is apart of but also her personal life. Contained herein is an overall culmination of the contents of her brain.
Friday, June 1, 2012
Are We Sluts?
Should we take back the word “slut” or just do away with it entirely?
A lady: that’s who we strive to be. A slut: that’s who we shy away from. But they both characterize women, supposedly the fairer sex.
Men bed sluts, but marry ladies. Women criticize sluts, but admire ladies. We all have, at one point or another, frowned at the girl being promiscuous, and venerated the woman exuding self-control and respect.
Is it right that we have such a dichotomy when we view females? It’s such an easy fall from being a lady to becoming a slut. All we have to do is kiss a few more men and flirt more openly. Or, maybe not even that.
Just by going after a boy who is the object of another female, a girl can be named a slut. She is condemned to such a title not by the boys who chase her, or who she is chasing, but by the culture that demands a female’s strict adherence to the rules of willpower and restraint.
Yet, men are given free reign when it comes to sexual activities. If they take more women, they are considered a “baller.” To women, they are considered players, but even so, they are never given a title that demeans their person or dignity. They can play games when it comes to women. The one who takes home the greatest number, or the hottest woman, just for a one-night stand, would be crowned the victor. However, if we exchange the man for a woman, such games fall apart, ridicule and criticism would be thrown around. Mothers guide sons and daughters to the world around them. As they give reproving looks to the girls out there, when they see them laughing jubilantly into the night with another man wrapped around her shoulders, her children learn that such behavior is not tolerated within society. They learn that others, like them, will judge such behavior and later on look upon the character of the girl with a wary eye. After all, if the girl cannot control her own sexual appetite, what is it to say that she can do anything at all or have any skill?
Perhaps mothers give a sigh when they see such behavior because they worry for the girl. The strength of a girl usually cannot compare to the man at her arm. If the man dares it, he could overpower the girl and commit the girl to acts that she did not even bargain for.
Would the title of “slut” really deter her from such situations? No, those who continually subject themselves to such conditions have long been considered sluts, yet they still go with the next strange man without a substantial concern for their own safeties. Those who are unfortunate to meet such a man by coincidence would not have been considered a slut. Such situations would come as an unwelcome surprise to family and friends. Thus, this protective effect of being called a slut is nothing more than misguided ancient ideas that intimidation may prevent promiscuous behavior.
Perhaps mothers brand other females with such names to prevent their sons from marrying broken goods. After all, men are supposed to marry the good girls out there, and a female who has been sleeping around cannot be a good girl. When a female breaks out of her stereotyped role, she is marked with a red X to prevent unknowing boys from accidentally falling for her, and following the path to their ruin.
In this day and age, men who are truly in love with such women fall hard regardless of their classifications. There are female gold-diggers out there, who divorce numbers of men and wring them dry of their possessions, but they are still always able to find their next target. Even if such women, usually dressed up as classy but desirable, are branded as sluts, they would have no problem ensnaring another man. Protecting these boys from women by branding such females as sluts is simply a futile method that mothers employ to caution their sons.
So let’s give up the term of sluts already. I am sure those girls have good qualities in order to attract so many men, so it must be my jealousy that fuels such views.
Perhaps that really is the truth of it all when it comes to the branding of women and if so, we need to recognize this reason and actively attempt to change it.