Tuesday, September 28, 2010


So as I already explained I love knowing things for the sake of knowing them. Well, what I learned today is rather interesting so I figured I'd share.

First I must tell you why I was looking up personality and mental disorders. It actually started because I was looking up fibro that according to the commercial is unexplained pain. I HONESTLY wanted to know more but what I found confused me even more.

Have you ever searched fibromyalgia? The first thing that google pops up in its suggest window are things like "fibromyalgia is fake".

"Fibromyalgia is another fake medical problem invented as a joint collaboration between lazy women, unethical doctors, drug addicts and the greedy pharmaceutical industry." -- http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fibromyalgia

Here's their reasoning:
"Fibromyalgia is not a disease defined by any real pathology or etiology but is rather defined by an aggregate of symptoms that include: tiredness, laziness, lacklusterness, sluggishniss, lolessness, fatassedness, whininess, soreness and fail." -- http://encyclopediadramatica.com/fibromyalgia

How odd is that? No other illness I searched came up with anything saying it was fake. So I went back to my original search typing in this that and the other thing trying to find an explaination to why so many people are claiming fibromyalgia is fake.

During my search I found another disorder that is in no way connected with fibromyalgia... but some of it did make me think its called Histrionic Personality Disorder.
In many cases, people with histrionic personality disorder have good social skills; however, they tend to use these skills to manipulate others so that they can be the center of attention.

However, the fact that it popped up this "attention seeking" personality disorder it started to make me wonder that if fibromyalgia is fake like some would lead you to believe maybe there is a real disorder lurking in the shadows. But I don't believe that its histrionic personality disorder since one of the main symptom is dressing provocatively and/or exhibit inappropriately seductive or flirtatious behavior. Which is what caused me to keep digging within the world of personality disorders.

I believe my chocolate lab has Dependent personality disorder. People with DPD tend to display needy, passive, and clinging behavior, and have a fear of separation.

I could not find any information to solve my curiousity for the "fake" disease.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Why so serious?

So I was looking through blogs tonight because I couldn't sleep and I noticed that most blogs (at least model blogs) are basic like "what I did today" and stuff like that. I feel sort of like an odd ball. But then again what's really going on in your head when you read the other blogs?

I really like to make people think. Look at themselves and ponder a moment. I may have said this before but I love picking peoples brains, finding out what they believe but more importantly WHY they believe it.

You could believe that "your god is an awesome god" and its your every right to believe that, but don't be surprised if I ask you "if your god is an awesome god, what about the others?" Because if he's awesome there has to be something to compare it to.... right? Or maybe just simply "why is he awesome?"

I want to know if you believe what you believe because of something inside yourself or because someone at some point told you to.
Do you believe the sky is blue? What do you mean yes?
Do you believe the war in Iraq is truly protecting AMERICAS freedom? Are you sure?
Is my grass really any greener than yours? No, seriously... have you seen my grass? Ha! I live in apartment! I don't have grass!

Friday, September 3, 2010


I'm so excited!
Tomorrow we're shooting the scenes from the new Krause Creation. Its going to be very spooky and scary!
I know I'll probably get scared but its ok, because the murderer is going to get me in the end.

Stay tuned for those images, maybe clips too! I'm so excited!

Thursday, September 2, 2010

ADD like a mo fo

A little bit of everything
Today was a beautiful day off from the modeling world.
Ok, let me admit one quick thing, I never completely break from the modeling world ... because well I cant leave my email unchecked or unanswered >.< I know I'm horrible like that but its just the way I am. Or maybe its just the way my phone is... it blinks and cries at me when I get an email and I have to put it out of its misery.

Now for the purpose of this happy little blog entry. Since today was a day off from modeling I spent most of it dancing around my little apartment and having a great time with music.

Yup, I gave a lap dance to the invisible man that lives on my couch... god, he's going to write a tell-all about me one day and be so disappointed when everyone goes "Illianna who?" HA!

But the song that sat me down on my ass at my computer and made me think of blogging was Meredith Brooks "I'm a bitch, I'm a lover" I think this is the perfect song that has to explain every woman on the planet... or at least the ones in the "free world" (whatever the hell that means)

The female is one of the most beautiful and erotic forms on this earth, or at least this is my opinion which is why I do what I do! I love my body and why shouldn't you love it too?
However, the female personality and brain...
"What do women want?" Hell, hunny, don't strain yourself the average woman doesn't know what she wants let alone what her entire sex wants, and the movie "what women want" doesn't even cover it.

Do what you do, and don't try to change.
I'm a bitch
I'm a tease
I'm a lover
I'm a goddess on my knees
I'll make you hurt and I'll make you suffer
I'm your nightmare
I'm your fantasy
I'm a child
I'm a mother

Once you come to terms that women are many things, just like a man... the case is pretty much ended.