Friday, August 8, 2014

Best Friends - An Update

My life consists two of best friends, one from the west coast and one from the east coast. Both girls add an enormous amount of drama to my life because I do love them. I care about them as if they were truly my sisters.


The west coast bff was my crazy friend. She was a horrible influence on me but we had a lot of fun together. However, we are both very strong willed and minded. Neither of us were EVER ok taking a back seat to the other and that has caused A LOT of problems between the two of us over the 8 years we've known each other. I have not directly spoken to her in about two years. While e-stalking her I saw that she was leaving her home (on the west coast) and venturing into my neck of the woods... not just the east coast but my city EXACTLY. I really don't know how I feel about this. Part of me is like "Contact her! Let her know you miss her" while another is pointing out the fact that nothing ever goes right when we are together and we just seem to step on each others toes. She has not contacted me about visiting me while she's here and part of me is willing to bet she wont. She'll slip in and out of this big town without two words to me...
“Scars have the strange power to remind us that our past is real.”
Cormac McCarthy, All the Pretty Horses


My east coast bff is almost just as crazy but she has a controlling boyfriend. I'd never fooled around with her until about 6 weeks ago where we got drunk while watching Orange is the New Black and things just escalated. He didnt like this (and not even a idea of a 3some could "kiss it better"). So she and I have been on a "break" for the last 3 weeks because he's wanted them to "work on their relationship". Well, their relationship still hasnt changed and after everything that has happened. I'm not sure if I can ever forget how she just laughed when he threatened my family and myself with a shot gun if we tried to help her. I'm sorry there is no way to explain that away.

I just dont know what to do with either of these girls and part of me just thinks that I am not meant to have female friends.

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