Over the last few weeks I've had to deal with hospitals, bureaucrats, and the government far more than I'd like and I've learned that some things about me haven't changed since I was a child.
I KNOW MY BODY BETTER THAN YOUR NURSES AND CONSULTANTS!
-- This boggles my mind that I can identify problems with my body better than those that went to school for it. I can also tell when things aren't needed. 4 hours after my water broke I had a gut feeling that something was wrong and that a c-section maybe needed. 24 hours later the doctors came to the same conclusion. After the c-section they were freaking out about my low iron and trying to get me to have a blood transfusion. I told them NO and I'm doing just fine now. Stupid!
I HATE BEING CALLED A LIAR BECAUSE YOU CAN'T DO YOUR JOB
-- This happened quite a few times while I was recovering from the c-section.
It was a nurse who did not follow procedure when giving me my pills. Yes, the pills she was trying to regive me was often just an iron pill (or another pill that would do no harm if I retook, which I did not dispute), but I informed her she had given me that pill already today and she disputed that fact just because there's a policy of marking things on a chart doesn't mean you didn't make an error. I know what I took. "That's against policy so that means that it didn't happen" BULL SHIT!
YOU HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE I DON'T THUS I DON'T NEED YOU!
I fucking hate the lactation consultants. I'm sleeping and she walks in like she fucking owns the place! I dont want your help, did you not read my chart?
That means that there is a large chance that my milk WON'T come in and even if my milk was coming in as scheduled I dont want you touching me, I dont want you bitching that MY daughter got a pacifier or a bottle from YOUR co-workers. I wasn't asked about either YOUR hospital just acted.
Also, if I want a pain pill GO GET ME THE NURSE! Your a lactation consultant, which doesn't amount to anything in my book. I don't give a damn if a lactation consultant thinks that 8 tablets of mortrain should be enough for 6 hours of pain when that pain is caused by an 8 inch opening in my stomach being held together by metal staples.
Now, GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!
WHAT AM I PAYING YOU FOR?
-- My biggest pet peeve is when I'm paying people for a service and they 'lose their place'. Yes, be aware that if you work for me... I am a slave driver, don't believe me? Ill give you the email addresses to several camera guys that have worked on my payroll. However, in my experience maternity ward nurses are some of the laziest people in a hospital. While in the hospital this last time my daughter who is 5 days old begins to cry-- I only earlier that day had the strength and muscle control to walk (by myself) out of my room and I'm having my first BM in almost a week so I ask if the nurse can take her back to the nursery (because this is going to take a bit, she's hungry and I'm probably going to want to die after this), first words out of her mouth is "you can take her". OH! Thank you for giving me permission, I've been taking her in and out of the nursery for the last 5 days, I had no idea I was able to do that.
BITCH I HAVE HAD THAT LITTLE GIRL ALL FUCKING DAY! SINCE 6AM!
I am doing VERY WELL and all your crap says I'm supposed to ask for help and not push myself too far.
WELL, SHE NEEDS TO BE TENDED TO AND IM TRYING TO SHIT WITHOUT POPPING A GOD DAMN STAPLE!
Ok, I didn't say that but I did think it really hard, I just said "yes, i could but im going to go have my first bowel movement in 4 days and she needs attention now" and the woman comes in.
Im on the toilet and she looks right at me and says,
"Ya know its fine if she just sits in here"
"Do you not hear her? She needs attention now and I am not capable of giving it to her" SO DO YOUR JOB!