"Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children. Do you understand?"
I don't think I ever really did... Eric Draven says this in The Crow. They're trying to tell us that mother is what children worship. She's beauty and grace, she's protection and security. For me, I knew I had a mother but like God I rarely saw her. For a woman that was pro-life, she never really cared about mine.
My mother drank and God knows what else while pregnant. She didn't believe in abortion and when the doctor brought it up she told him "if you suggest that again, I'll go to a different doctor" she loved telling me that story. She felt like such a hero in that moment. That moment was fleeting, cause she didn't stop drinking. Maybe she cut down but I still got a handful of disorders that scientists believe are fetal alcohol related.
• Learning and memory
• Understanding and following directions
• Switching attention between tasks
• Controlling emotions and impulsivity
• Communicating and developing social skills
• Experiencing depression and anxiety
• Performing daily life skills, including feeding, bathing, counting money, telling time, and minding personal safety
Plus I got a splattering of chronic pain and an autoimmune disorder which should have killed me before puberty.
Yay me! I'm a survivor but I knew that as a toddler when my mom would be too "sick" on a Friday or Saturday that she couldn't be bothered to even pour me cereal. I learned early that the only person I could count on was me.
God helps those that help themselves. That's mother.
